Speech
Does the way we speak have to do with Tznius?
Tznius is not only clothing and outer apperance it is how we conduct ourselves as a whole. speech is definantly apart of tznius, if we speak with improper language then we are not conducting ourselves in a refine and modest way which is what tznius is all about(anonymus, 21)
Agreed. Outer tznius is the natural outcome of a modest interior . The foundation of modesty is on the inside. If a person is dressed modestly but is speaking inappropriately, he or she is missing the point.(age 21)
What about yelling? raising one’s voice? or being really out going and friendly..are these parts of speech not considered tzniut?
Yelling and raising one’s voice- this is more in the department of kovaish et yitzro- when a person is angry it is hard to control a temper, but after the fact yes, I guess it is not exactly modest to lose one’s cool.
Regarding being really friendly, it depends how and to whom. Is the person being fake? is this person only super friendly to the opposite gender? I don’t think being friendly to someone who is in dire need of a smile should EVER be considered untzniyus... (age 21)
By raising one's voice, one is drawing attention to one's self. Could this be considered "untznius"?
What difference does it make if one is super friendly to the opposite gender or not?
What should one refrain from speaking about with others? (Age 26)
Gossiping and speaking about others to your friend, co-workers, or even one's spouse is against Jewish Law. What constitutes gossip? What about describing someone's appearance to clue someone in about who you're talking about? This person is a brunette? This person is overweight? (22)
Depending on if the person you are speaking to can determine exactly who you are speaking about based on this information it would be considered gossip. How would you describe someone's religiosity by only using clothing descriptions: "she's the type that wears pants, ya know??" or "she buttons her top buttons...so you know what that means.."
Side Note: I highly suggest everyone to read up on the laws of Shmirat HaLashon (guarding one's self from gossiping).
Is it ever really necessary to describe someone's religiosity by clothing descriptions? (Age 22)
Sometimes people can relate or pin-point the type of hashkafa someone has based on their mode of dress. For example: a woman who covers her hair and wears pants probably has a different hashkafa then one who covers her hair and wears skirts... when planning a party or get-together you don't want to offend anyone by inviting people that don't fit one another's hashkafa or will feel uncomfortable because someone is dressed according to a different approach.
This also comes up often when discussing shiduchim, match-making for dating: "Oh, you will love her! She want to cover her hair but wears pants too! So your type!" or "Ooo She is so not for you, she buttons her tippy top button...all the time!"
What would have been wrong with just saying "she is so your type! " and then leaving it for the guy to find out on the date? Or saying "I don't think it's shayach" and leaving it at that?(age 22)
There may be a difference between "leaving it at that" and adding: "because she wears....)
There's a difference on the page, but I don't see how it makes such a practical difference that it justifies what potentially could end up as loshon hora, judgement, etc. (Age 23)