Say What??
Comments or reactions we get, because of the way we dress
I’ve gotten a range of reactions, between whistling to comments of “wow she covers her hair with a tichel!”
I used to enjoy the feeling of guys whistling at me or staring at me but then I realized that I don’t even know these strangers and they for sure are not staring at me because they like who I am.
My aunts and other relatives sometimes make comments that make me uncomfortable: “you’re gonna wear a skirt under this dress aren’t you?” or “leave the skirt as is. Why do you need to sew up the slit?”
The comments I love though are the questions I receive regarding why I cover my hair mainly with a tichel/mitpachat. But my response varies depending on who’s asking.
In college one day, my classmates were trying to guess everyone else’s nationalities. One guy looks at me and goes, “I feel like you’re Puritan.”(Another hits him and goes, “Idiot, That’s not even a place!”) I muttered, “Why? because I’m wearing a skirt?? That’s because I’m Jewish!” (Btw I tried to look up modern day Puritans....really don’t think there are any...) (Age 21)
That reminds me! One day a man (in an army uniform) said hello to me...then a few minutes later he asks: “are you a nun?”....well I guess that’s it for that mitpachat look...at least in this country.
My friend told me a story once about how she was embarrassed to wear a skirt to school after she saw two girls wearing skirts being rude to a non-jewish classmate, thereby making a huge chillul hashem. My friend therefore did not want to be associated with them. I took a powerful message from that story that one cannot assume she is exempt from being kind to others simply because she is dressed in a modest manner. “Derech Eretz Kadma L’Torah”
- Age 21
I've gotten "you're wearing stockings today?! Are you going to go to Michlalah???" And in school another day, I was wearing a kikiriki under a shirt because the sleeves were sheer and someone said to me "you're so frum, wearing a kikiriki under that shirt," and I explained to her why I chose to, not that she really cared. A few weeks later, I was wearing a skirt that fully covered my knees and the same girl said to me "you're so tznius," and I smiled and said "I take that as a compliment!" I personally feel that once you are strong and confident in what you do and believe that it's right, when others comment or notice, even if they don't have the same standards, it only enforces your reasons for doing it and strengthens the desire to continue to do so. (Age 16)
"Your shirt is so cool," a guy stranger said to me. We were in the Bahamas, and I was about to slide down a water slide in the water park. I looked down at my shirt that said "Wisconsin" on it, smiled and shrugged. "Oh no, I'm not from Wisconsin, nor am I a Wisconsin Badgers fan.." He insisted it was cool. I insisted it was a plain t shirt. He finally explained that he thought it was "cool" of me that I was covered up in a water park, a place where most people do not (Age 20)
I used to enjoy the feeling of guys whistling at me or staring at me but then I realized that I don’t even know these strangers and they for sure are not staring at me because they like who I am.
My aunts and other relatives sometimes make comments that make me uncomfortable: “you’re gonna wear a skirt under this dress aren’t you?” or “leave the skirt as is. Why do you need to sew up the slit?”
The comments I love though are the questions I receive regarding why I cover my hair mainly with a tichel/mitpachat. But my response varies depending on who’s asking.
In college one day, my classmates were trying to guess everyone else’s nationalities. One guy looks at me and goes, “I feel like you’re Puritan.”(Another hits him and goes, “Idiot, That’s not even a place!”) I muttered, “Why? because I’m wearing a skirt?? That’s because I’m Jewish!” (Btw I tried to look up modern day Puritans....really don’t think there are any...) (Age 21)
That reminds me! One day a man (in an army uniform) said hello to me...then a few minutes later he asks: “are you a nun?”....well I guess that’s it for that mitpachat look...at least in this country.
My friend told me a story once about how she was embarrassed to wear a skirt to school after she saw two girls wearing skirts being rude to a non-jewish classmate, thereby making a huge chillul hashem. My friend therefore did not want to be associated with them. I took a powerful message from that story that one cannot assume she is exempt from being kind to others simply because she is dressed in a modest manner. “Derech Eretz Kadma L’Torah”
- Age 21
I've gotten "you're wearing stockings today?! Are you going to go to Michlalah???" And in school another day, I was wearing a kikiriki under a shirt because the sleeves were sheer and someone said to me "you're so frum, wearing a kikiriki under that shirt," and I explained to her why I chose to, not that she really cared. A few weeks later, I was wearing a skirt that fully covered my knees and the same girl said to me "you're so tznius," and I smiled and said "I take that as a compliment!" I personally feel that once you are strong and confident in what you do and believe that it's right, when others comment or notice, even if they don't have the same standards, it only enforces your reasons for doing it and strengthens the desire to continue to do so. (Age 16)
"Your shirt is so cool," a guy stranger said to me. We were in the Bahamas, and I was about to slide down a water slide in the water park. I looked down at my shirt that said "Wisconsin" on it, smiled and shrugged. "Oh no, I'm not from Wisconsin, nor am I a Wisconsin Badgers fan.." He insisted it was cool. I insisted it was a plain t shirt. He finally explained that he thought it was "cool" of me that I was covered up in a water park, a place where most people do not (Age 20)