Wigs
Real looking wigs look...pretty realistic sometimes
Not going to go into the Halacha behind it... but to quote my Rabbi, it’s almost gotten to a point where a man wakes up in the morning and says to his wife honey! put on your sheitel! :p (age 21)
It just makes sense to have an extra reminder that you are married. That’s a huge part of your life that you want to keep present all the time, but it must be really hard to keep that in the forefront of your mind constantly (at work, school, etc.). So more than a reminder for others, it’s a reminder for the woman herself, a little bit of extra “koved rosh” (get the pun?). I think a teacher once put it this way (probably playing off the gemarah of the man whose tzitzis saved him from sinning with a zonah): Imagine a woman going to have an affair. She’s undressing and all’s going well until she says, “hang on, I just have to take off my wig...” Yeah, that kind of made an impression on me (age 21).
Sadly, I know of a true story of that happening...but as the person who told me the story put it: “the wig came right off too”... After a few years, or maybe even months, the woman might get used to having something on her head and totally forget what its purpose is. Hence, I am putting together this doc. so women can sit and think about what exactly they put on in the morning when they get dressed.
Why do women cover their hair only once they are married and not before? (if you go according to the opinion that states that married women’s hair is considered nakedness)
I think the Rambam says that women should cover their hair after age 3.(age 21)
Why did no one else say/hold like that?
I really don’t know. Well, the Rambam lived in Morocco if I’m not mistaken (I may be mistaken please correct me if I am wrong) and so perhaps there were more Muslims there who covered up and because it was a much more common practice to have your head covered, no matter if you were married or not, perhaps the Rambam poskined this way. This is all speculation I did not look up if I am correct.
So it is according to surroundings? Is there any basis besides for the communities and surrounding cultures we live among? Are other cultures and peoples defining our laws of dress?
THEY DEFEAT THE PURPOSE (Age 27)
I recently got married and I think that it is a real challenge to cover your hair. Especially as the weather is getting warmer. To say that wearing a Sheitel defeats the purpose of covering your hair is like a slap in the face a bit, in my opinion. I think covering your hair, in any way that you feel comfortable doing it is admirable and amazing. I have yet to wake up in the morning and get excited over wearing a Sheitel and I applaud all those who cover their hair regardless of the length and naturalness of it. The point is that you, the wearer, knows that this is not my hair. I am saving my hair for my husband. For me, that's the major thing to keep in mind: you can cover your hair with whatever- as long as it's covered.
(Age 22)
So you believe that covering your hair is a message for the wearer and not a message for the viewer?
I find, for myself, that wigs can be mistaken for a married women's real hair; however, I believe it's a personal reasoning and opinion of what and how a women should cover her hair. I wear mostly beanies, mipachats, or the extent of hair is my fall because I have a headband, hat, beanie, etc. that is a constant symbol to myself and to someone else to notice that there is something noticeably different on my head. I have had a women come up to me while I was wearing my fall, "I noticed that you always wear a headband, a hat, something on your head why?" I felt happy and good that even though they may not know it's a wig, there is something substantially different.
I find covering your hair, whatever means, a beautiful concept; however, to each their own.
I did hear recently that Lakewood community is coming out with Rabbis telling women to take their expensive, long wigs, that to some, may be untzniut, to cut their wigs shorter because it will lead to less or none Hatzlah calls. Where is the correlation? Who gives them the right to say that; women have a right to look attractive and the wigs, whether long or short, will not cause Hatzlah to be called less; it's all up in the hands of Hashem. (Age 25)
I like the way you think!
I also agree that everything is in the hands of Hashem...but what do you say about brachote we get from Tzaddikim? Or Segulahs? Or just plain ol' praying? Some people take on a chumrah or stringent act or even just a regular mitzvah in order to change their fate and have Hashem change his decree set against them. I agree that the Rabbis may not be able to promise such a yeshuah but maybe you heard wrong and it is more of a request then a promise??